Birth plans are bullshit

August 21, 2019

Being an inpatient on the antepartum wing of the labor & delivery unit, I often see the gaggle of soon-to-be parents taking the tour. I’ve been here for 37 days, and I’ve never done the tour. (I did, however, tour the NICU). I imagine the labor & delivery tour here is something like this: “All

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Smashing through the 30 day mark, and the halfway point

August 16, 2019

Today marks 29 weeks and day 32 inpatient! I had a growth ultrasound yesterday, and the babies seem to be on a good trajectory. Last time, they were quite small measuring at 5th and 10th percentile. Yesterday, they were better at 9th and 20th percentile. Their pesky femurs are still lagging behind, but my doctors

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28 weeks!

August 9, 2019

It is day 25 inpatient and I’m 28 weeks today! 28 weeks is a big preemie milestone. πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‰ The past week has been relatively uneventful. Some things that happened: 1) I made Sam a woven cow. When I was making the pig, he said he wanted it. I told him the pig was for the

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27 weeks!

August 2, 2019

It’s day 19, and I’m 27 weeks 1 day. That means I get to throw out this scary 26 weeker pamphlet! Here are some important updates! #1. I’ve started to document the strange combination of items the nurses use to try to keep the babies on the monitors. This is quite the imperfect system, and

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Liquid nitrogen, ice cream, and desk chairs

July 26, 2019

It’s day 11, and it’s also “switch day,” the day we switch to a new gestational week– we’re at 26 weeks, which means we can throw those scary 25-weeker NICU pamphlets away. I’m settling into life here. I like to imagine that I’m in a scifi story. It’s probably some kind of minimum security prison

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A false alarm

July 23, 2019

We’d had a nice Saturday, with two visits from Erin and Sam, a visit from Sharon, nice weather, and plenty of time sitting outside by the ship canal, watching the boats go by. I was preparing for a nice and relaxing Saturday evening. We usually do my evening NST around 8pm, so I picked out

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Day 4: RAGE

July 18, 2019

I think I’ve entered a new grieving stage, the stage of RAGE. The adjustment process of accepting that I’ll (hopefully) be here for a long time has been hard. I’m on day 4, of hopefully ~60-65. It feels like a long, long way to go. Meanwhile, small things make me feel trapped and frustrated. Things

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